Tuesday, April 5, 2011


you never stayed ... you never came , whenever i waited. I wanted to tell myself, it was'nt fair , it was'nt right that whenever I stayed awake , you refused to ring the bell. Whenever I was home , you never called, and when I wanted to speak , you always had a cold.

I am asking you today - why do you always leave just before i arrive ? Where do you go off when I am waiting for you ?

Why do we never meet - on diverging roads, intermingling , intersecting lives we lead - yet, like an ill-fated omen , i can never read you.

today also , i waited, i waited long after you had left. you never looked back, never lingered , never knowing that i would come. i am not going to come after this, i tell my computer, i tell the song i am listening to , while i wait - knowing , there is this never coagulating mystery of ours that will bring me back, waiting , staring , never meeting.

i think, you and i , were meant to disappear, into each others memories,of imperfect features, for its been so long since we had actually first met. it is all an idea now , it never really existed .

it is'nt you i wait for then, it is that something, that imperfect memory made perfect by the long wait, by the time i had on my hands to nuance it, to sketch it out , that i seek. and you are right - i will pass you on the street, looking for you , but i wont recognize you ,for it is not you i want to meet - it is me.